Managing your online retail store can be a very rewarding experience. There are things that you really ought to do while managing your online store, and we have written about them previously. But what about the things you should NOT do while managing your online retail store? We could have gone in a lot of directions while writing this article, but in characteristic fashion, we choose the wackiest way. So here are 5 things you better NOT do with your online store, unless you are calling it a social experiment. Allez!

Please DO NOT do the Following Things

1. Sell Weapons of Mass Destruction on Your Online Store

Call us pacifists, but we aren’t really into WMDs as a thing. If you are, we recommend you keep them in your backyard, at a safe distance from your kids and pets, and DO NOT attempt to sell them during the Diwali sale. They are not fireworks. If you are confused between the two, you should probably do a quick Google Search for ‘blast radius’.

2. Use Pigeons to Deliver Your Products

Yes, we know Amazon is coming up with airborne drones. And we know pigeons are cheaper. But that does not mean you can go medieval and start using pigeons to transport your packages to your customers. And no, you cannot use owls – Rowling already snatched that one up. How about you try to overhaul your product shipping systems instead of finding new ways of abusing airborne animals?

3. Use an Abacus for Inventory Management

Respect though, if you are planning to do so. Abaci are beautiful instruments that, in the hands of an expert, perform amazing calculations. But then, you are not a 10th century mathematician. You are an online seller, and if you are looking for radical ways to manage your inventory, try using a multi-channel inventory management system like Browntape. Although the downside is that it has a severe lack of colorful beads, it makes up by just being better.

4. Send Your Customers a Jack-in-the-Box

For the uninitiated, a Jack-in-the-Box is a toy that consists of a box which when opened, pops a clown or in more extreme cases, a boxing glove with a spring attached. Although the idea of multiple people eagerly opening their packages at home only to get punched in the face brings a slight chuckle to ours, rest assured that it is a bad idea. Instead, how about being good to your customers by giving them timely notifications for their delivery using Browntape’s automated email systems?

5. Put This On Your Dedicated Website

Or this. First of all, because they are very 2003. Secondly, although there is no dearth of fun things to click on on the internet, you can have a lot of fun circulating things like these to your friends or spouses, but not your customers or suppliers. You don’t want to be known as a spammer after all.  How about you try and read more about how to manage your dedicated online store better instead?

Every once in a while we go into our happy festive mood! But when we talk business, we get serious. To get serious with us, don’t hesitate to get in touch with Browntape! Happy holidays!